my birth story as a second time mom

TLDR: medical induction turned natural hospital childbirth!

As I am writing this I am snuggled up on the couch with our precious son. We are nearly four months postpartum and lately, I’ve been reflecting a lot on our birth story. Maybe because its winter and life is slowing down. Or maybe because we are coming up on the one year anniversary of finding out I was pregnant with our second child.

Either way, I found myself feeling ready to share our birth story!

Birth Stories

During both of my pregnancies I was obsessed with birth stories. Youtube, podcasts, blog posts- you name it. I loooved reading and hearing about all the incredible ways women bring their sweet children into the world. They made me feel empowered and informed stepping into both of my births. And I hope this may do the same for some other mamas- whether this is your first baby or your fifth, each birth in uniquely wonderful in its own way.

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How I Prepared For an Unmedicated Delivery

The Back Story

With my first daughter, I knew right away that I wanted to have an unmedicated delivery at the hospital. I watched countless birth stories, read all the books, and truly felt so prepared. I anticipated laboring for a long time at home before going to the hospital and then having her with my OB that i loved. But it all happened a lot quicker than I anticipated, my OB was unable to attend, and I gave birth after arriving to the hospital only an hour prior.

The outcome was ultimately what I wanted- an unmedicated hospital delivery- yet it was unlike anything I had imagined it to be. But that was okay. I learned that babies have their own idea of how they’re coming into the world and that in a lot of ways, birth is beautifully out of your control.

And like every other situation in my life, I was later able to see what God was teaching (and preparing me for) through that experience.

36 Weeks Pregnant

My whole second pregnancy was a bit more uncomfortable than my first. I was notably bigger than with my daughter and carried him low. This made for some hip and back pain that was worse than my first pregnancy, but otherwise I felt really good. I was still able to work and regularly go on walks (and somewhat keep up with my busy two year old)- just a bit slower (and a bit more waddle-y 😅)

So it was pretty unexpected when I started experiencing a little bit of bleeding and passing clots at 36 weeks pregnant. I called my OB and since I had just gotten off of work (having been on my feet most of the day) and it was pretty minimal to go home, rest, and head in to be checked out if it got any worse. The next morning I had a little bit more clotting and after going back and forth most of the morning, my husband finally convinced me to go in just to be safe.

After a whirlwind of blood tests, scans, and monitoring it was determined that I have a genetic condition making it harder for my body to clot. This put me at high risk for a placental abruption and hemorrhaging after delivery.

There were a lot of scary possibilities that were thrown around but thankfully, it all was ruled out. But it meant that they wanted to keep a really close eye on me and our baby in the final weeks of pregnancy. And induce labor.

While it wasn’t my ideal plan or what I initially wanted, I was fully onboard with why it was important and the medical reasoning to move forward with induction. I also had incredible respect for my OB. She was the perfect balance of supporting me as much as possible naturally, while still offering interventions as needed for safety.

Side note— this is why I always recommend women to find a birth provider they love and feel really confident and comfortable with. Have the hard conversations early on in your pregnancy and if you are not comfortable, find another provider! It can make such a huge difference in your pregnancy and birth experience.

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38 weeks + Preparing for Labor

ready for a night of infusions and blood tests (and my last night of pregnancy!)

For both of my pregnancies I really adopted the idea of “babies come when they are ready” and was not planning on ever being induced unless medically necessary. But here we were, having multiple doctors, teams of midwives, and our own intuition saying that this was medically necessary- not only for my own health after delivery, but our baby’s safety.

Because I had gone into labor spontaneously with my daughter at 39 weeks, they wanted to induce me a little earlier than that so that they could prepare my body for labor in order to mitigate bleeding as much as possible. The plan was to induce me at exactly 38 weeks.

On July 30th at 7pm, my husband and I checked into the hospital for a night full of transfusions of cryoprecipitate (a clotting factor). The hope was that this would bring up the fibrinogen (the clotting factor that I am genetically very low in) in my body and prevent hemorrhaging with delivery the next day. That night, my OB checked my cervix and found it to be “favorable” and thought I wouldn’t need any cervical ripening over night in preparation.

That was such a celebration! I had shared with my OB that even though we were inducing, I wanted to keep it as minimal as possible. She was fully on board and supportive of that plan. So with that good news, my husband and I tried our best to rest throughout the night, knowing we would be meeting our son the next day!

Since they were giving me cryoprecipitate which is a blood product, they needed to closely monitor my vital signs in case of a reaction. They also needed to draw my blood every 3 hours to check that my fibrinogen levels were going up accordingly. So while I tried my best to sleep, it was pretty broken and sporadic (not much different than how I had been sleeping at 38 weeks pregnant 😅).

Inducing Labor

After a long night of transfusions and blood draws, they told me that my fibrinogen was not raising as quickly as it should have with the amount of cryo they had given me and that for some reason, my body was destroying the fibrinogen that they were giving me. Either way, it meant that they wanted me to deliver sooner rather than later.

They began pitocin around 930 in the morning.

Shortly after, my sweet cousin walked into the room. When I had found out that I was going to be induced, I asked if she would come for my birth. Immediately, she bought a ticket and flew out with her daughter for a few days and it was the greatest gift. She has always been one of my best friends and one of the most calming people I know. She is a nurse herself so I knew she would also be a great medical advocate while I was in labor- it’s not my husbands strong suit since he doesn’t know much on the medical side of things, and I wanted him to be free to support me as I needed.

I sat on a birthing ball and we all talked and laughed. We ordered some breakfast and I tried to hydrate in preparation for labor. I could tell that I was having minor contractions from the pitocin but I could also tell they weren’t doing much. They were just little tightenings across my stomach. My nurse continued to gradually increase my dose and while the tightenings got a little stronger, they still didn’t feel productive. I had an all natural delivery with my first child so I knew what those strong, effective contractions felt like and these just were different.

My OB came in to check on me and we talked about the plan moving forward. We agreed that at noon she would come in and break my water and hopefully that would make things a little bit more productive. The goal was that breaking my water would kick start contractions a bit more and they would be able to turn off the pitocin. That would allow for my body to progress towards labor naturally at that point.

Around 1130 an acupuncturist came in to help me relax. She placed acupuncture needles in my hand, legs and feet and I got to zen out a bit before my OB would come back. After not sleeping much all night and being anxious for labor to get moving, it was such a gift. Looking back, I think having that 20-30 minutes of relaxation before everything got going was critical in me having the mental capacity for a natural birth.

Breaking my Water

Around 1230, my OB came in and talked me through what we would do to break my water. At that point I was 3 cm dilated (the same as where I was the night prior). I wasn’t disappointed with my lack of progress despite being on pitocin all morning, because I had known the contractions weren’t doing much in terms of dilation.

When she broke my water, there was some gentle pressure and then a warm gush of fluid. After the initial fluid ran out, I moved from the bed back to the birthing ball where I was more comfortable. I remember telling my husband and cousin to stop making me laugh because every time I would feel more amniotic fluid come out which basically felt like I was peeing 😂😅

After breaking my water I felt contractions pick up in intensity. It wasnt long until I felt like I could no longer sit on the birthing ball through contractions because there was too much pressure in my pelvis. Around 130 I moved to standing at the side of the bed and leaning forward where my husband would occasionally give me counter pressure on my hips when I asked. I had never needed it with my first labor and for me, it seemed to just move the pain forward making it more tolerable. I just rocked my hips side to side during the contractions and the rhythm helped me get into the right head space for birth.

At that point the pressure was moderate and I could breathe through them without much noise or struggle. I find that with both my labors, I could use this time of increasing intensity to get into a sort of meditative headspace. Breathing and rocking and swaying. Breathing and rocking and swaying. Finding a natural rhythm where my body, my son’s body, and the process of labor could all work together as one cohesive unit.

My nurse set a step stool next to the bed which allowed me to rest one leg up higher than the other and lean into my hips during contractions. I could notably feel him descending each time I did this. My nurse continued turning down the pitocin because it was obvious that I had reached the tipping point of my body maintaining labor independently.

Naturally Progressing

Around 2 pm the pitocin was fully turned off and my body was having consistent contractions. While they continued rapidly increasing in intensity, I felt like I was still coping well through them.

My husband, my cousin, and my nurse were all extremely receptive to my needs through labor. I never verbalized that I wanted it to be quiet, but i think they could all pick up on the peacefulness I was seeking, and how I was comfoted by the calm around me.

As the contractions picked up in intensity I remember my cousin saying one word that resonated so deeply

surrender

surrender my birth plans. Surrender my body. Surrender my own mental race of questions and anxiety and trying to plan every detail.

surrender the muscles in my jaw that held tension through the peak of every contraction

surrender my pelvis, allowing my son to further descend and make his entrance into our arms

surrender my fears of any health complications, knowing the Lord had already showed us so much faithfulness and protection and care

It became the anthem in my head through every contraction and moment of discomfort through labor.

with each precious moment of surrender, you are taking one step closer to holding your baby

By 230, I was extremely uncomfortable and moved to kneeling over the head of the bed. Around then was when my body began moaning and struggling with each contraction and I remember feeling like there was no position that I could get comfortable. My husband continued giving me counter pressure as I would ask him to.

Around 250 I was noticing increased pressure, discomfort and feeling all-around a bit crazy. I felt like I was getting close to transitioning and pushing and I asked my nurse to check my cervix because I felt like I needed reassurance at that point that we were getting close to the end.

She checked me and I was fully thinned, but at a six… She gently told me that I still had a ways to go.

At that point I remember leaning over the head of the bed and thinking that if I didn’t transition quickly, I didn’t think I could do this unmedicated. My mind briefly thought about an epidural but the thought was pushed out of my head with trying to get through the next contraction. It felt so much more intense than my previous delivery and I didn’t remember struggling as much as I was at that moment.

my amazing husband exactly 5 minutes before our son was born

At that point I was moaning whether I was having a contraction or not because the pressure was so intense.

10 minutes later I began feeling the urge to push- or more accurately, I could feel my body begin pushing on its own. The nurse called my OB in and she saw a small crown. They called an additional nurse into the room because they wanted extra hands in case I did have any excessive bleeding.

As I hung over the head of the bed I remember thanking God that even though labor began in a way I hadnt wanted, He was giving my body the ability to labor and progress. Through all the uncertainty and fears and blood draws and iv’s, He had protected us and comforted us and made a way.

My nurse checked my son’s heartbeat with a small doppler and I heard the rhythmic beating that had become the soundtrack to my days (because of the increased risk of placental abruption, I had gone in for fetal monitoring several times a week and been able to hear his heartbeat regularly in the weeks prior) and it was the grounding moment I needed to find the strength deep within me

My body had a couple of minutes of a break before my final contraction. While with previous contractions I had felt my body ramping up and beginning to push, with this final contraction, my whole body immediately rocked back to push and I vaguely heard my OB’s voice (I later found out she said “compound presentation” meaning that his hand came out first, rather than his head). I felt his body turn and again my OB’s voice

But this time I could make out the words

“i’m passing him through your legs”

I reached down and grabbed his warm slippery body and pulled him up to me close. I kissed his sweet face and remember the sweetest relief washing over me.

a blurry picture because it’s a screenshot from the birth video my cousin took- but the sweetest moment of shock and relief and awe. (and you can’t see it in this photo, but at this time my husbands jaw is literally on the floor 😂🥺) Our sweet baby was finally in my arms!

“he’s here” I cried

He’s really here.

Final Stage of Labor

Before giving birth, we had met with the hematologist to come up with the best plan in case I did hemorrhage after delivery.

So they gave me a couple of medications through my IV to help prevent bleeding while I waited for my body to pass the placenta.

I honestly do not remember much physically at this point other than holding my son- there is nothing in this world like those first moments of skin to skin after delivery. But I do remember my OB telling me that I was going to feel some pressure as it came out.

And then it was all over. She checked for any signs of tearing or hemorrhaging and I had neither (praise God!), and I got the sweetest golden hour with our son. It wasn’t long before he was rooting around and trying to nurse and to my shock, he had a great latch almost immediately. (with my daughter we struggled with a shallow latch for awhile and worked a lot with lactation consultants)

Postpartum

In the coming days and weeks my body healed and I had minimal bleeding- which had been one of the biggest concerns. But I was very adamant about resting, nourishment, and letting my body heal.

I can look back on my birth with such awe and gratitude for how everything worked out- our son was healthy, I didn’t have any hemorrhage or excessive bleeding, my best friend was able to be there to support us, and I had the best team of medical professionals I could have asked for. And even though my “birth plan” didn’t include an induction, I was still able to have the outcome of an unmedicated delivery that I had wanted.

So maybe you just got recommended an induction. Or maybe you have no idea what you want out of your labor experience. Or maybe you are the first in line for an epidural or have your c-section pre-scheduled — I hope you know there is beauty in any and every way babies come into this world. It is truly a miracle that I will never fully be able to wrap my mind around, but will spend all my days being thankful for.

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