The 20 to my 80/20 Healthy Lifestyle
Do you feel the weight of perfectionism in wellness culture? What if I told you it doesn’t have to be that way to live a healthy, thriving life?
These are the ways I balance freedom and structure in my own life, in order to have holistic wellness.
As a self-proclaimed “crunchy mom”, I have often found myself on this slippery slope. On one half of the mountain is pasture-raised eggs, grass-fed meat, and organic cotton onesies, while the other side is costco diapers in bulk, rotisserie chickens (that most definitely have been given antibiotics), and the occasional diet coke.. And somewhere in the middle of all that I have found my happy place.
A spot that nourishes mine and my family’s bodies, while also giving freedom to my mind. Freedom to find the peace that comes from nourishing our bodies well, and not living in fear of “toxins” or trying to obtain “perfection”.
That happy place is often referred to as an “80/20 lifestyle”. 80% healthy and high quality and 20% that has a bit more freedom and flexibility. And if you’re anything like me, I have often wondered about what falls into other people’s 20%— because Lord knows that isn’t often shared on social.
So, without further ado, here are 8 things in my life that aren’t the cleanest, or highest quality, or even downright healthy. But they fit into our lives and bring convenience, joy, comfort, and community. Because life is about more than “crunchy living”.
8 Things I do That Fall into the 20%
Hair Dye
Since i was 16 years old, i’ve been covering my roots with dark brown hair dye. You see, I was given the genetic gift or graying early. My great grandmother herself was gray by her 20s and I am on that track too. Yes, I’ve gotten my minerals tested, eat plenty of copper and zinc, and manage my day to day stress- but sometimes your genetics do their own thing.
One day I will embrace the grays. But for today, I enjoy having dark hair.
I try to lessen the burden by spacing the time between dye sessions and using products that are not as harsh.
Rotisserie Chickens
Yup, those $5 ones from costco. I’ve shared before that I love roasting whole chickens at home as part of our meal prep. And while I would love to get back into that routine, between having a toddler and a newborn, building a business, and normal life stuff, i’m just not there right now. So the occasional rotisserie chicken makes an easy, convenient, affordable and protein-rich meal for my family.
Ziploc bags
I shared in my postpartum freezer meal post that several of the meals I cooked were stored in ziploc bags. Yes, I try to avoid our single-use plastics. Yes, I don’t love the chemicals, microplastics, or environmental impact. But i do what I can to limit the negative effects of plastics and appreciate the convenience, affordability, and way I can freeze them flat to save space 👏
Screen time before bed
Any of my past coaching clients will be shocked on this one, because for a long time I diligently avoided screens an hour before going to sleep. But in this season of my life, my husband and I have been loving watching shows together before bed a couple nights a week. Bachelor and Survivor have been our shameless go to’s.
As far as I can tell it hasn’t been affecting my sleep. And it has been a fun ritual of laughter and connection with my husband.
Eating out
I’m a sucker for sushi and my husband’s favorite is Costa Vida sweet pork. They are both quick and convenient options for us to pick up for dinner once or twice a month, or every couple of months. Yes, they probably use seed oils and conventionally-raised meats.
But to-go meals sometimes help minimize stress in the day to day life of raising two young kids. The VAST majority of food we eat is made from scratch in our kitchen, so I know our bodies are not depleted of the nutrients and nourishment we need.
Diapers
Both of my babies have sensitive skin. And while a few diapers brands have not worked well for them, we have found that the kirkland hypoallergenic ones work fine. They don’t leak, irritate their skin, and are an affordable option. They are by no means the “cleanest” option, but they work for us.
Clothing
When I envision my dream wardrobe it is a closet full of loose linen pants in earthly colors, beautiful cotton maxi dresses, and timeless minimalistic pieces. But the truth of the matter is I have been pregnant of breastfeeding for the last 3 years. The muscle I once worked hard for in the gym has been replaced with fat stores to nourish my babies. And I am not mad about it.
But it has meant that most days I am comfiest in HeyNuts leggings (why couldn’t they have come up with a better name?) off amazon and a loose tshirt or sweatshirt. All natural clothing that you see online just isn’t a priority in my life or budget right now.
EMF’s
If there is one thing that I haven’t even bothered with tackling are EMF’s. We don’t turn off our router at night, often fall asleep with our phones on our nightstand, and occasionally use wireless headphones. We connect our phones to the car via bluetooth, and don’t always use speaker phone when we take calls. It’s something I have occasionally thought about, but done nothing to mitigate or stress about.
Why do I share all of this?
It’s not because I am trying to be #relatable or #authentic.. it’s because time and time and again, I have seen women held captive to the bondage of perfectionism. Trying to obtain a “healthy lifestyle” has turned into their religion and identity.
Maybe it started with a diagnosis, or a hobby. Maybe your original intent was to “clean up your life” and support your health. Or maybe you were inspired by how a mom on instagram takes care of her family. None of that is wrong.
The problem comes when optimizing turns into a life lived in fear. Fear of chemicals or pufas or polyester. Stressing about trying to fit pasture-raised everything into your grocery budget. Or believing your worth is somehow tied up in the number of endocrine disruptors you avoid.
How to find your own 80/20?
10 years ago I was struggling with amenorrhea (no period), mood swings, acne, and headaches. It took cleaning up my lifestyle and holding strong to the “80%” in my life. That meant prioritizing nourishment, cleaning up my home and beauty products, eating enough calories to support my body, getting more sleep, and reducing large amounts of stress.
This allowed my body to find and build resiliency. And that led to healing.
It wasn’t perfectionism but rather, a whole heck of a lot of grace.
Look at your own life through a lens of grace- what are the areas that you believe will “move the needle” the greatest amount? Is it eating more whole foods, ensuring you are sleeping 8 hours per night, or drinking more water?
With most clients I have worked with, they have a pretty good idea of where they need to start to make improvement in their health. Sometimes you just need the accountability to actually get started!
I’d love to hop on a free call with you to chat about your wellness goals, what steps might help you the most, and how you can stick to the 80% so that your body has the resiliency for the 20%.
Wishing you a life of wellness
Kaelyn
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