How I am Holistically Preparing for Postpartum (the second time!)
Currently I am 33 weeks pregnant with my second child and feeling the itch of nesting beginning to set in. The lists are being made, freezer meals are being prepped, and I am ordering the last final things I need stocked before our little guy arrives. And even though this is my second time going through the nesting phase, I continue to be shocked at how different this pregnancy has been.
With my first, I really didn’t feel myself slowing down or feeling uncomfortable until i was 38-39 weeks pregnant. But even then, i was working full time in the ER as a nurse, working out multiple times a week, and feeling pretty much “normal” overall. This time around, I hit 30 weeks and everything seems to have come to a screeching halt. I “feel it” much more this pregnancy- and not only physically. Emotionally and spiritually I have felt pulled very inward- I feel my social tank being a whole lot smaller, and my capacity for “extras” to be near zero.
Truly all I want most days are to soak up this time with my daughter and husband while it is still “just us”.
Having my pregnancy feel so different has also reminded me that I cannot assume my postpartum experience to be similar this second time. This time we will also be juggling the care of a two year old, on top of our newborn. Yes, I have breastfed a child before, but this will be a whole new human to learn it with. And while I have a good idea of how I want my birth experience to go, there are so many unexpected parts of that as well.
But I also feel like my experience from my first postpartum period to be invaluable and I keep reflecting on what I loved and what I want to do differently this time around.
My intentions for postpartum
Every single mother has different goals for their postpartum experience and that is amazing! But I would also deeply encourage you to evaluate these goals and make sure they are your own.
It is so easy to try and accommodate others (especially when you have so many people wanting to come over and meet the baby and excited for you!), or want to rush through the postpartum phase. But this is a deeply healing time for yourself holistically as a mother- physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually- there is truly not one area of your life that isn’t affected in those new days after bringing a baby home. And with that transition, you should feel empowered to confidently make the decisions you need to make for your family and your healing experience.
With that, these are some of my goals this time for postpartum!
i remember wanting extra carbs in those first few weeks of breastfeeding, so i made sure to include some yummy baked goods in addition to the normal freezer meals!
Have more foods prepared
With my first baby, we had a couple of freezer meals prepared and our family brought us over a lot of meals in those first two weeks and we loved it. And I remember my husband and I saying we wish we had prepared more because they truly were so convenient! Here is what I am planning on having prepared:
bone broth - I regularly make several batches of bone broth per month and want to have this pre-made for postpartum. Not only do I love to sip on bone broth for its nutrient density and digestion benefits, but I also love to add it into soups, rice, and other recipes when cooking. (if you’re not into making your own broth, I love the perfect supplements bone broth powder— simply mix it into water and season, or throw a couple scoops into a recipe for added protein and nourishment!)
cooked chicken- i love cooking a whole chicken in a dutch oven or slow cooker and having it available for different meals. My plan is to cook up one or two whole chickens and breaking them down and putting the meat in different soups and recipes, and saving some for just plain ol’ chicken! (and then the bones will go straight into a pot for that bone broth I mentioned)
sourdough- now, I am not entiiiiirely sure if this will work the way I am envisioning since I have never frozen any sourdough recipes before, but I am planning on making some of my family’s sourdough favorites and freezing them up to have on stand by! Some of our favorites recipes are sourdough tortillas, pancakes, breads and scones. If you have done this before and have any feedback, i would love to hear from you!
freezer meals- my goal is to have 10 meals frozen before I deliver. Normally I double the batch depending on the recipe so that we can at least have 2 meals out of it. I feel like this will give us a lot of easy, nourishing meals once visitors slow down a bit!
Some of what I have already prepped include:
a baked pasta (I used force of nature meat ancestral blend in the sauce to make sure we are getting some organ meats into our diet)
turkey pot pie
chicken enchiladas with sourdough tortillas and our favorite green enchilada sauce from Siete (we buy it from Thrive market but have seen it at some local health food stores too!)
chicken curry and vegetables
EDITED LATER TO ADD— I ended up loooving all the meals I prepped and was so excited when I was gifted pre-made postpartum meals from a friend to add to the freezer. Mama Meals are all made with high-quality, organic ingredients with an ayurvedic focus- meaning they are nutrient dense and made with warming ingredients- perfect for postpartum healing and recovery. You can use code KAELYN for $20 off your order of $200!
Prioritize rest
I have always had a “go go go” personality and love getting out of the house. With my daughter we were out and about after just a few days and in retrospect, i feel like that is why I had such prolonged bleeding and cramping postpartum. After reading The First Forty Days (highly recommend for anyone preparing for postpartum), I really want to intentionally prepare a “cocooning phase” for our family. While I haven’t officially decided, I am wanting to plan for at least 2 weeks where we are rooted at home and really prioritizing restfulness.
Minimize visitors to specific times
With my daughter I really felt the pressure of everyone wanting to come over and meet her. And don’t get me wrong, I was so excited for all of our family to come over and see her and hold her! But it was difficult trying to coordinate everyone and still prioritize rest.
With our first child, my husband planned and coordinated all of our visitors which was so helpful. But I think this time I would like to implement a set time each day that is most convenient for us if people want to come over and visit. I think this would help me to prioritize rest and nourishment without feeling like we have people coming and going around the clock.
Social Media Restrictions
Something that the author spoke to in The First Forty Days was not using phones, tvs, or even reading as a distraction from rest. This was something I had never really considered but I can definitely relate to. I know there have been times when my body is tired and rather than sleeping, I lay down and scroll on my phone or watch a movie. While some of that isn’t bad at all, I just want to be more intentional about my media consumption and make sure it is not hindering me getting enough sleep.
One on one time
With our second baby on the way, something I have struggled with mentally is knowing a newborn is naturally going to take time away from what I would normally spend with my daughter. My husband and I have talked a lot about wanting to intentionally prioritize each of us having one on one time with her as she transitions into being a big sister and her not being the only one anymore.
Alone time
I remember with my first child feeling completely touched out with nursing on demand around the clock, and just the hormonal swings of postpartum. Now having a toddler and a newborn who both need me and will want physical touch and closeness, I plan to set aside time daily to truly be alone and fill up my cup. I am hoping that being more intentional in this way will allow me to avoid some of those feelings and allow me to respond to the needs of my family from a place of fullness (rather than frustration, overwhelm, or just plain ol’ burnt out).
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Sorting out the logistics
While those are all the goals I have set for the “fourth trimester”, I also know that I need to prepare now to make sure that I can actually rest and be as intentional as I hope to be. Which means there are some logistics to sort out…
preparing my physical space
With spending more time at home in the newborn phase, I want to feel gooood about my environment. Over the last couple of months, I have been finishing up home projects and purchasing a few odds and ends that I have been wanting around the house. I just envision our family of four coming home to a space that is homey and cozy and tidy and ours.
setting up supplies
I have three separate “themes” for the supplies I am pulling together and organizing: breastfeeding, my recovery, and baby.
breastfeeding basket
my home is split level and there are two spaces I plan to spend most of our postpartum time and nursing- one upstairs, and one downstairs. In each space I have a little basket made with the following:
haaka - if you are going to buy one, make sure to get the style I linked with the suction bottom and lid! The shape of the haaka is naturally not very spill proof and the lid came in handy mannyyy times.
breast pads - while i love the idea of the no waste reusable ones… they contributed to me getting thrush the first time around because they were not moisture wicking 😬 soo I am avoiding those at all cost this time and going straight to the disposable ones! I used these ones for the first couple months of breastfeeding my daughter until I no longer leaked
refillable water bottle
recovery basket
oooooh postpartum recovery… the time for granny panties, pads the size of a sleeping bag, and leaking from God knows where 🙃 I bled for a good six weeks after delivering my daughter (I believe most of that was due to how active I was and not allowing myself enough time to truly rest and recover), so I am making sure we have plenty of supplies on hand this time around!
rael organic disposable underwear
peri bottle - the hospital I delivered at gave me one, and then I had a friend gift me the Frida Mom one that I have linked— definitely think the Frida Mom one is worth getting since it works “upside down” and can help you to reach those.. hard to reach areas if you know what i’m saying 😉
baby things
In the same areas that I have my breastfeeding supplies, I also have a basket of newborn essentials. I found that having a couple of different locations with things easily accessible made it really convenient! This is what i included:
a couple clean onesies (for the inevitable blow out, spit up, or breastmilk hah!)
diapers
wipes
diaper cream (again, we love the Earth mama brand for this!)
spit up rags/ burp cloths
Rallying the troops..
Peep my sweet pup in the back who gets anxiety when tiny babies are brought home and actually needs to prepare for what’s to come more than the rest of us😅
To be honest, i am not good at asking for help. It has always made me uncomfortable feeling like I am a burden to someone else.. Over the last couple of years though (especially since becoming a mom), I have seen some of those thoughts shifts as I have adopted a more “village” mentality.
I have also really narrowed in on my core people- ya know the ones that are truly there to serve you and your family well, leave you feeling encouraged and cared for, and are like minded about the important things.. if you haven’t found them yet, do whatever you can to build that support network because it truly makes suuuuch a difference!
I have also had to step out of my comfort zone and ask for help, knowing that I am sure going to need it and cannot do it all. Some ways that I have done this:
Chatting with my husband
He truly is the most involved, caring, and supportive man I know and am so lucky to be raising a family with him. But even so, he cannot read my mind or know what my expectations for postpartum are without me telling him clearly. We have had many conversations already about how I am hoping this postpartum phase goes, and what my personal priorities will be. We also gotten into the routine of doing a nightly checkin with one another where we talk about the days highs and lows and what each of us needs. It helps to keep lines of communication open and intentional, and create moments together when we are otherwise spread thin throughout the day.
Making childcare plans
We are so lucky to have family close by that works to meet our childcare needs and support our family. We have already set up the plan for when I go into labor and who will be with our daughter during that time. They have also talked about their availability in supporting our family with childcare help during other times, especially once my husband goes back to work.
Creating boundaries
At the end of the day, the people who truly care about you and your family will respect your boundaries. Often the hard part is making those boundaries known.. i know that because hiiiii 🙋🏻♀️
One of the boundaries we have already communicated is that we will not be having any additional family for my delivery or in the hospital- with the exception of our family that will bring our daughter to meet her little brother!
Mental and Spiritual Preparation for Postpartum
It’s not just physical recovery and breastfeeding and freezer meals.. If you have already been through a postpartum period before, you have experienced this transition. And I don’t think it is something that is talked about enough! Not only are you going through all the physical changes, and hormone fluctuations, but your identity is literally changing. You are going from someone who does not have children and becoming a mother- someone responsible for the raising and teaching of other human lives that will one day (hopefully!) be positively contributing members of society.
I don’t think I recognized how emotionally and spiritually stretching this would be for me the first time around. I knew in head knowledge what was coming, but I don’t think until you go through it do you really understand it. And now, even though I am already a mother, I know who I am will continue to evolve in response to the greater responsibility and expansion of our family.
Some ways I am preparing for this transition are:
reflecting on my own goals of what I want my marriage, parenting, friendships, and business to look like in this next season, and also being realistic about what my priorities in each of those is!
spending more time in meditation and prayer
cleaning out the excess- both materialistically and spiritually. Getting rid of the clutter, the habits that don’t serve me, the people that are straining to my mental health, and thoughts that don’t align with my goals and aspirations. In reality, this looks like a lot of journaling, reading, and creating space to check in with myself.
There you have it.. a holistic approach to preparing for my upcoming postpartum period. Hopefully some of these areas can resonate and inspire you for ways you can ready your life for your own postpartum period. You got it mama!
-Kaelyn
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